Anxiety

Been feeling anxious since last week. Don't think I have a restful weekend due to this anxiety.

Over the weekend, I spent my time watching motivational videos. One of the video was by Simon Sinek explaining about all the different hormones that are release by our body during different situations. There 4 good positive hormones but there is 1 bad hormones release by the body during stressful situation i,e cortisol. It is not good as it suppress your immune system. That is why, those who work in a high stressed environment are more incline to fall sick.

I need to reset my mind and thinking. Rise above the stressful situation at work or just be braver and don't give a shit. Probably I need to do all the above to overcome my anxiety issue. It is easier to overcome all this if you can focus on something else or someone else.

When my other half was nearby, I get to separate my self between my office and personal life (most of the time). When I have to bring my work home, it will get mashup together but there will always be time that I could just stop working and focus on him. Since he is no longer around, my mind is at work all the time. I tried to set goals, personal goals, daily goals but my mind will always worry about my job. I am just scared that I am not good enough. I am scared that I made mistake. I am scared all the time now when in reality, the experience is not as scary as I think it is.

Worries and being anxious is such a waste of time. I put on this brave face everyday when my inside is just a jumble of mess. I am still not doing what I am suppose to be doing and I blame my self for that.